It’s that time of year again. These next two weeks are mostly a stressed-out blur. Students’ eyes are bloodshot, their breathing is shallow and for the most part the student body as a whole looks like a bunch of zombies. Welcome to dead week, everyone.
Due to the surge in zombie apocalypse everything, there have been plenty of kits and guides that would help get anyone through some sort of rise of the undead; however, wouldn’t it be more practical to have a survivor’s guide for the real zombies out there?
Here it is, student zombies: your essential list to surviving dead week and finals.
1. Every student needs coffee, lots of coffee. For a super jolt of energy, sophomore sociology major Morgan Hatlestad, who works at the APU coffee shop, recommends ordering an Americano with an extra shot. This drink is “not messing around,” Hatlestad said.
2. In order to slip past these next two brutal weeks without injury, senior psychology major Meika Folkerts believes a good snooze is absolutely essential.
“I know it seems impractical to think a college student can actually get enough sleep, but I swear you can conquer the world if you’ve had enough sleep,” said Folkerts. “I always say, ‘what has to get done will get done,’ and it’s true, it always does. Sitting there and telling yourself this is much more beneficial than sitting there and freaking out about the impending doom of every single due date between now and your flight home for Christmas.”
3. Get your Scantrons and blue books now. For every exam there is always at least one student who forgets one of the two, so stock up from the Paws ‘n’ Go or bookstore now to avoid being “that” student. Grab a couple extra of each (and some brownie points) to be the greatest relief for the unprepared student.
4. Take care of yourself. Part of the doom of the end of the year is that so many people get sick from stress, lack of sleep or poor nutrition from living off the Cougar Den’s fries. Through Vitamin C packets, Naked Juice or a giant bottle of Sunny D, be proactive to fill up on the nutrients necessary for survival. If it’s too late for that, be sure to cover all coughs and sneezes and keep some hand sanitizer handy.
5. In case of fire, crashing, jamming or locking of a printer, every student should stock up on Cougar Bucks immediately. This way, in case of anything short of a printer apocalypse, the library will always be an option. To purchase Cougar Bucks, students simply have to go their home page, scroll down to the box labeled “One Card Information” and click “Add Cougar Bucks.” Or, they can bring cash to the appropriate machine. (There’s one in Marshburn Library near the printers, and one in the Ahmanson computer lab on West.) It costs 10 cents to print one page in the library, so plan accordingly.
6. Folkerts believes puppy therapy could really help students get through the rough patch. Schools such as Harvard and Yale have even started using therapy dogs in their libraries to help students de-stress.
“During dead week if you see a puppy, you have every right to pet it. Allow yourself some puppy playtime,” Folkerts said.
Be sure to stock up on these essentials for the last couple weeks. Have a happy dead week and a blessed week of finals, APU! May the odds be ever in your favor.