ZU Media recently ranked the best NBA jerseys, so naturally, we had to drop the rankings for the worst jerseys.
Last week, we published a list of the top 10 NBA jerseys in the history of the league — because what’s basketball without a little swag? The piece celebrated looks from the 1980s all the way to 2018. Despite the fire styles explored in last week’s piece, the league has also seen a plethora of head-scratchers.
This piece is for them.
Meg Thee Stallion has coined the term Hot Girl Summer, encouraging the short shorts coupled with high socks look. And while I love Meg to death, that look isn’t for everyone. The 1980 New York Knicks proved that point with their road uniforms.
Aside from having the number above the name, a weird move in itself, the large “NY” print on the thigh of a man pulling down a board isn’t a vibe.
The Clippers can’t win, during the playoffs and beyond. That includes their newest look. These jerseys resemble a mix of the LA Times font mixed with a bit of LA urban entourage writing. It simply doesn’t work.
The early 2000s were rough. Soulja Boy was leading the wave of overly baggy clothing and the bayang was in. The Dallas Mavericks contributed to the wave of cringy early 2000s styles.
These jerseys were a dark silver that resembled a trash bag. Once the players began to go up and down the court, the jerseys then looked like wet trash bags. It didn’t help that the Mavs failed to have strong performances in the uniform.
Mark Cuban summed up the disaster best. “They looked like wet garbage bags,” Cuban said in 2013, “but I took them off the market after one game.”
Not everyone can rock stripes. Beyonce teaming up with Adidas was an anomaly. One would point out officials, but unless the official is Scott Foster no one is really paying attention to the referees.
Unfortunately, the 1996 Houston Rockets didn’t get the memo. Not only did they try to incorporate white stripes into their jerseys, but they also mixed it with dark blue and red with animated grey writing. The mesh didn’t mesh and ultimately made for an all-time cringe.
Some colors just don’t mix. Blue, orange and black are those colors, to the exact. Yet, the Cleveland Cavaliers still tried the mix. They tried to mix these colors together through a design that included a thick blue stripe going across the middle of the black jersey and shorts with orange writing surrounding it. It was actions like this that contributed to their 40-year championship drought.
America has questionable moments that plague the great nation’s image – the Philadelphia 1992 home jerseys being one of them.
There is nothing wrong with red, white and blue. Plenty of US Olympic teams have pulled off great looks using these colors. The problem lies in the design the 76ers decided to use. The stars coupled with three different fonts make the jersey unappealing to look at.
Green should be left to the Celtics. If that fact wasn’t clear enough, the 2004 Dallas Mavericks made it crystal clear. The team sported prominently green jerseys with blue sides and an awkward font across their chest. To top it off, they placed their numbers above the team name on the front, again a generally weird move.
Some gold is good, while some gold turns your skin green.
The Washington Wizards road alternate jerseys sported gold that gave me green reaction vibes. The shiny gold jerseys mixed with black shorts felt like something a local AAU team would wear at a weekend tournament.
They say the thought is really what counts. That comment should’ve been taken back after the Spurs unveiled their military appreciation jerseys. The Spurs have worn numerous camo uniforms to honor the many men and women who live in and around San Antonio. None of these jerseys have been good.
The green specs mixed with a tan background is reminiscent of a poor signal game of Tetris, only with the Spurs logo slapped in the middle of the game.
Incredibly, the Wizards weren’t the only team to break out shiny gold uniforms – and they also weren’t the worst.
The 2006 Sacramento Kings take the cake for the all-time worst uniforms with their gold on gold look. Not only did they try to pull off gold on gold, but they did it with a dark purple sash-like stripe on the right of their shorts and white and purple stripes on the side. It’s, quite frankly, horrifying.